I have been corrected repeatedly for pronouncing "the" as "thee." And "either (read: E-ther) as "eye-ther."
By my five year old son, I mean.
In the car the other day, he told me that I make parenting mistakes. I make "yelling mistakes," and, he goes on, "the kind of mistakes like if you're driving to a birthday party and you take a wrong turn."
Last Tuesday afternoon he informed me that I'd gotten a note in his school folder for not sending his Encore (gifted program) folder to school.
I found no such note, but the point was most certainly taken.
And just shortly ago, when called by HR (at last!) to confirm my clearance and orientation date as the science lab teacher at Ziggy's school after the Winter Break, I told him that we'd be going to and from school each day together.
No "cool mom." Oh, no.
Instead, the thoughtful instructions, "When we're outside and Mrs. Flynn tells you to call someone over because I have told on them for doing something bad, don't say to them, 'let's just talk about it.' You should just tell them to go to time out."
"Oh, because I don't really use time out and what I usually do is talk about problems?" I ask.
"Right," he says.
"And you're worried I'll do the wrong thing," I ask.
"Yeah," he confirms. "At school you're just supposed to tell kids to go to time out. OK?"