Yours for the joyful (busy & messy) revolution. Life on the frontlines of motherhood and activism.

It's been a whirlwind week, and I'll recap by sharing a slightly modified version of the email note I sent off to the grandparents and siblings yesterday afternoon:

Dear all,

Great to hear from everyone recently and more on that soon. Will do a quick quick update on us, then move along.

I’ve got a needy / super snotty boy at home with me today—he’s already thrown salsa and juice all over the floor and emptied a large canister of sea salt all over the dog bed and all over the living room. With suitcases and duffel bags and baskets of MAU stuff everywhere, it sort of looks as though a bomb went off in our house. I’m loving up my boy as much as I can today, then trying to regain some sense of order to more rightly align my own sense of balance.

Did I tell you that he grew half an inch since his birthday? Crazy, huh?

We have houseguests coming this weekend – two co-founding Mothers Acting Up arrive Thursday night. We're so excited! While I've had the experience of knowing someone from phone and online prior to meeting them in person (My Beloved Mister knew one another this way for years prior to hanging out live and in person), I've not had this particular experience professionally. I'm so excited to finally meet Beth and Joellen, and look forward to meeting Anjali and Juliana, too (in February when I'll go to Boulder). Beth, Joellen and I will work press and go to meetings on Friday during the day, then Beth does her one woman show (M)other that evening, followed by a discussion and snacks. I’ll be making some. refreshments for post-performance, as will a couple other mama friends. Saturday morning will be the three hour activism workshop for mothers, then the Girlcott action at Bongo Java. Mama Loca and her kids are coming to town, too!! Hoorray!!

I met a gentleman named Joey King from Veterans for Peace (Nashville) at our Memphis hotel—he was giving a talk about counter recruiting at the youth arm of the Gandhi King Conference and he invited me to speak to their group in early November about MAU. At the end of that week I’ll be going to Norris to present MAU to the state Church Women United conference. The following weekend is the Mamamade (which I did last year), where I’ll be selling MAU handbooks and Nashville MAU stuff, too. There's a Michigan visit with the Babcock and Christenson clans near Thanksgiving (can’t wait!) and the following weekend I have an invitation to present a MAU workshop to the Cookeville Friends (Quaker) meeting, and the weekend after that (should our proposal be accepted) I’ll be passing out handbooks at Dan Zanes concerts in both Knoxville & Atlanta. I may actually see if I can present to the Friends meeting the weekend of the 16^th instead, so I can have one non-working weekend with my boy…. he did great all weekend, despite a very nasty cold, and even went with me (and his wonderful dad!) to the studio very early (drive time) this morning when I was on the Liberadio! show at Vanderbilt (the show will air again on both WAMB and another AM talk station later this week). When the podcast is up, I’ll send it along. By the time we got to Mother’s Day Out, poor Ziggy kind of fell apart and I recognized his need to be home with me today.

We had a most amazing family trip to the conference and in Memphis in general. We spent Sunday at the Riverwalk Park at Mud Island, which I can not recommend highly enough. We loved it, and Ziggy is still wanting to ride the monorail again. MBM was super helpful during all my conference working, including carrying all the heavy stuff and even manning the Mothers Acting Up table in the auditorium and just being so good with the babe and with helping me stay focused. The boys had a great time together running up and down ramps and playing all over the beautiful Christian Brothers University campus and they even went to Graceland (“Elvis’ house,” Zig says) together. We had a great fifth anniversary, including a delicious BBQ supper during which our child slept through the whole thing—we hadn’t had a meal together just the two of us talking and visiting in what? Two years, maybe? Really. It was kind of great. Later that night, MBM left me and the snotty sleeping boy at the hotel (with my full blessing!) to go see a band he wanted to see. I was really pleased that he did something like that that he enjoys, and honestly, I was glad enough to rest up for presenting my workshop the next morning.

I wish I could write a better, chattier, less direct note, but my own cold is fanning the flames and supper needs to be cooked and the aforementioned messes need attention and my boy needs some snuggling before I work more tonight when my man comes home, so I must off for now.

More another time.

Love to all.

XXX

paige

Cake. Man. Love.

The Mister's birthday was Saturday. A poor night of sleep with a 3 AM waking that went for hours nixed our annual birthday weekend morning pumpkin farm trip but we still picnicked at the radio station and went (albeit briefly) to the over-the-top not-gonna-do-that-again Shriner's Circus. (Clowns, especially motorcycle driving Shriner clowns, really ARE creepy!) And over the weekend, I prepared our family favorite birthday cake. This time, as with friend Kate's cake a few months ago, I subbed organic frozen blueberries and almond extract for the cranberries. If you haven't yet made this basic sour cream coffee cake, do already! We've had it for birthdays for many years in my nuclear family, at our wedding, and for all kinds of brunchy or other "special" occasions.

Happy birthday, Babe.

Where we came from, and where we're going....

On Friday my Mister and I will have been wed five years. They've been hard years as often as good ones, for a whole host of reasons, but we're not giving up. I think it's a sign of times to come that we'll be celebrating our anniversary this year as a family at the Gandhi-King Conference in Memphis. In honor of where we've come from, and where we're headed, I share the following sometimes telling quizlet I filled out at a mama friend's behest. (I'm not at all sure how the tagging thing goes, but post away in the comments if you'd like to share your own answers.....)

1. Who eats more?

sometimes me.

2. Who said "I love you" first?

he did. i let it wash over me. then said it back. we were on the phone; me in my little attic apartment in a hillsboro village farmhouse, him in his parents' basement office in rural south western michigan

3. Who is the morning person?

me

4. Who sings better?

i think we both have nice voices.

5. Who’s older?

he is. by three and a half years.

6. Who’s smarter?

he is. but then, i am. if we'd ever let each other excel without bickering so much, our smarts would complement one another.

7. Whose temper is worse?

mine. but then his. we're just very different in the way we handle emotion. i spill out. he holds in. we both can blow.

8. Who does the laundry?

we both do.

9. Who does the dishes?

we both do.

10. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed?

he does, if we're talking looking up at the bed from the foot.

11. Whose feet are bigger?

his.

12. Whose hair is longer?

mine. though not by much at this point.

13. Who’s better with the computer?

me. but he has infinitely more patience with small instruments and fixing excel or word things that leave me cursing a blue streak.

14. Do you have pets?

oh, yes, we do. mother / daughter maine coon pair: junie moon and buddy wiggins. junie was born under the house next door to my place in hillsboro village. by the time i took her in, she was pregnant. shortly thereafter, eric moved in. a few years later, we took in bert, a rescue german shepard mix. he was supposed to have been a foster for a few days.

15. Who pays the bills?

i do.

16. Who cooks dinner?

i do.

17. Who drives when you are together?

usually he does, but sometimes it's me.

18. Who pays when you go out to dinner?

it comes from the same pot; he generally pulls out the debit card or the cash.

19. Who’s the most stubborn?

we're both mules.

20. Who is the first one to admit when they’re wrong?

me. but then, sometimes him.

21. Whose family do you see more?

mine, as they're only three hours away as opposed to his who're in Michigan.

22. Who named your pets?

he named junie moon and buddy wiggins, the former before he and i were even a couple but we were friends. i named bert.

23. Who kissed who first?

he kissed me. and what a kiss! a magnolia grew out of my chest.

24. Who asked who out?

i was the bold one with regard to making him be my friend. which led to everything else eventually.

25. Who's a hardcore romantic?

we both are, though you wouldn't really know it these days.

26. Who’s more sensitive?

me in a much more easy to see and understand way. but he's deep. and very sensitive when he allows himself, or feels safe / comfortable enough to go there.

27. Who’s taller?

he is.

28. Who has more friends?

me.

29. Who has more siblings?

we each have a brother & a sister. we're each eldest children.

30. Who wears the pants in the relationship?

he'd say me. i'd agree a lot of the time.

Children deserve a bigger piece of the pie.

Mamamade 2007.

I'm not sure what happened to the flier I wanted to share here, but you can check out Mamamade 2007 over here. I'll be keeping y'all abreast....

Transition.

We're toughing it out, these separation difficulties. Ziggy did so beautifully the first day of "school" at his Mother's Day Out program, but has since had a bit of a rough go. Crying and missing mama at naptime. Then the last two days, a traumatic parting with wailing and calling out.... Both days, though I remained cheerful and loving in the parting, I bawled in the car after having left him in the care of nurturing and wonderful teachers. And while that is so, they aren't me. And he is my boy. And I don't so much subscribe to the idea that the separation is critical for the current time. I don't imagine that when he is 14 he will still want to nurse and co-sleep and wail when I part. He is two now, and that's a world of difference.

Poor Ziggy cried off and on on through the day on Wednesday, and didn't even touch the lunch I'd packed for him. When I arrived to pick him up, he came directly to me, having just awakened from a nap he fought hard to avoid. He kissed me full on the mouth and said, "You came back." Heart sinks. Tears well. Yes, yes, I came back. I will always come back. Ziggy could tell me how he missed me, that he'd had a rough day, but it was also a good day. He told me ",Miss Johnni hold you." He held both his stuffed rooster puppet, Oaxaca, and the blanket that was "Mommy's when she was a little baby."

He was hoarse from crying for three more days.

This is all still so new, and transition has been historically (and currently) difficult for my boy. And while I've made this choice for him because his having a mother who earns is imperative, and because his mother can (theoretically) get a bit more done more efficiently with a bit of childcare help, I can't help but question myself in the face of Ziggy's "mourning the loss of his mother," as one of his teacher's put it to me. (The last few distracted "school" days have proved more taxing on my heart and mind than productive....)

I'm simply not willing to push this if it is not something that enriches his life and brings him contentment. I understand that many parents make this choice because they believe independence and separation is critical at this point. For me, however, it's an attempt at greater balance, not preparation for school or for peer socialization. The boy gets plenty of both in our life day to day. So for now, we wait to see what feels most right, what works.

When I spoke with Miss Johnni shortly after having arrived back home to work, she let me know that Ziggy was easy to console this morning, that he'd not cried again, that he was participating in Kindermuski class and seeming to enjoy himself.I like knowing this. And too, that they'll call me when and if I am needed. It's just such a big thing to let my boy go. It's hard stuff seeing him so unhappy, knowing how difficult it is for him, even if only for awhile.

So we'll give it a little more time, and see what shakes out. If necessary, I'll find another way.

Stone Soup.

Ever in an effort to simplify, go greener by reduction of my family's carbon footprint, and live in a way that jives with ideals and principles, I've recently made a commitment to shy from conventionally raised meats in favor of locally humanely and free range / grass fed animals. We women of this country, as the buyers of most things our households require, exercise the greatest purchasing power of all: 83% of all spending in the US, according to Time Magazine. And because right is right to do and because it really does matter where we put our money, as we are an economical force ripe and ready to create change that does ALL of us good, I'm doing what I can, when I can, both for the nutritive and ethical health of my family and for the good of my community, and my planet. Lofty? Yeah. Elitist? I hope not.

I've gone round and round about this from multiple standpoints, and while my Mister still regularly purchases chicken livers from the Kroger deli in throwaway plastic clamshell packaging, I feel it's important and worthwhile to continue to do our part as a whole. We've had a CSA membership with Delvin Farms for several years now, and now, along with some mama friends, I've sought out local humane sources for the meat that our family continues to choose to eat. Vegetarian for a number of years, I've found that I just do better with meat, and feel strong and best about it when the source is right. To that end, this week has had a gaggle of us running from one end of town to the other with a host of coolers and drop off and pick up points for whole processed chickens from a Centreville family, and both beef and lamb from a Mennonite farmer just over the Kentucky line.

All of this took a great deal of coordination and phone calls and emails and such, as this is the beginning of something we hope will sustain our community farmers, AND our families for some time to come. One morning as Maria and I hammered out some details by telephone, Ziggy and another child I've been watching occasionally played on the swingset and in our backyard sandbox. "You know," said Maria, "sometimes we might complain about how much all this effort is taking and I have to call so and so again, but think of the community we're building around this!"

Right she is. We're also compelled, in these interactions, to rely on one another, to share our lives and to become less isolated. For me, a highly social being with a not so social husband who is gone from home seven days a week, this is critical. As it is for our very social toddler. The Mister, by his own admission, benefits from this network of community though he himself is not drawn toward growing it or maintaining it in large part. I have to say, however, that he is appreciative and involved when called on, as we have all relied heavily on one another in times of distress (illness, hospitalizations, marital strife, work loads...) AND in times of celebration (weddings, births, housewarmings and birthday parties). Too, during these get togethers (in person, by telephone, and online) based on task, we plan up additional projects, share recipes, pass along toys and clothing from one child to another, support one another's businesses and organizations and in general create a larger nest for our respective broods.

These friends, these connections, keep me wed to not just my husband (five years right 'round the corner) but also to my *life* in a deep way. Spiritually, ethically, socially, with joy and with gratitude. They keep me accountable and I enjoy that, seeing the rewards reaped for my boy and my man, in addition to my own self. Like I said, I'm social, and I recognize that not everyone shares this need for symbolic hand-holding round the pot of Stone Soup, but for those of us that do, finding our tribe is vital to our wellbeing.

And good food-- sown, grown, harvested and then prepared with some local lavish love-- binds us all together. Of late, that meant fresh salsas and simply *amazing* vegetable enchiladas for our Fall Fiesta, a combination housewarming and second birthday party for our boy. There've been salads and farm fresh egg sandwiches, and this very morning, butternut pancakes, in response to Ziggy's request for "Cake, please, Mommy!" in all likelihood a holdover craving from the pumpkin chocolate chip concoction for aforementioned party. And then last night there was this marvelous soup, as sustaining for the spirits as for the nurturing of the bodies of my family.

In thinking of how to best marry a chicken I thawed with a slew of goodies from my most recent CSA share, I was pondering on fall and warmth and came up with a nice variation on sweet potato chicken soup.


Sweet Potato Chicken Soup with Greens


Ingredients:

1 small whole chicken
Olive oil, pat of butter
3-4 ribs celery, chopped
1 carrot, sliced in half moons
2 onions, chopped
1 green bell pepper, chopped
1 red Hungarian pepper, minced
4-6 cloves garlic, chopped
5 small – medium sweet potatoes, peeled and cubed
Salt, pepper, cinnamon
1 bunch mustard greens, chopped

Boil chicken in liberally salted water and cool in its own broth. Sautee celery, carrot, onion, peppers, garlic in olive oil w/ a small pat of butter until all are slightly caramelized. Pull cooled chicken (will be warm, but NOT hot) from the broth. Add veggies to the broth pot and boil gently. Salt and pepper soup, add a dash of cinnamon. Pick cooled chicken, discarding skin and fat, save the bones in a freezer zip lock for soup another time. You can cube chicken or leave in rough pieces. Ten to fifteen minutes prior to when you want to eat soup, add your greens (use any dark fall / winter green) to the top of the soup pot and place lid back on, allowing them to steam but retain bright green color.

I would have made this spicier, but declined to do so in favor of the boy’s palate, which enjoys spice but not hothothot. The Mister and I seasoned our bowls of soup with the deliciously tangy green Tobasco sauce.

I imagine you could do this soup with any slightly sweet winter squash in place of the sweet potatoes. You could add a shot of lime and tortilla chips and add cumin to the seasoning. Canned tomatoes and / or green chiles would also be nice here. The variations are endless. In this one, the cinnamon with the spicy pepper and the Tobasco was really nice and very Autumnal.

It's time: go public, mamas.

Learn more about how to act up right here!

Celebrating Mothers.

A PROJECT OF MOTHERS ACTING UP, Celebrating Mothers: Global Portraits to Inform and Inspire will showcase 20 mothers of young children around the world who are involved in social advocacy and are initiating positive change in their communities. Please see our website and send us your stories of exemplary mothers who are making a difference. Submission deadline for nominations is October 12, 2007. www.celebratingmothers.org Contact: amie@celebratingmothers.org

MAU Live comes to Nashville: tickets now available online.

SO exciting!! Nashville Mothers Acting Up brings MAU Live to our city!!

You can now purchase tickets for MAU Live: Theatre for Empowerment’s Nashville engagement right here.

(M)other, a one woman show from Mothers Acting Up co-founder Beth Osnes hits the boards in Nashville Friday November 2 at the First Unitarian Church.

The performance will be followed by refreshments and discussion.

Rehearsal For Activism, a workshop led by Beth Osnes will take place in the same location on Saturday November 3, followed by an exuberant girlcott action, babes and children in tow!

Onsite childcare will be available for both the performance and the workshop.

Additional information available at the ticket link above.

Purchase now for a price break, and to ensure tickets are available for you and yours!! Please share with friends, forums and fans….

Background:
Mothers Acting Up (MAU) works to ensure the health, education and safety of the world’s children by mobilizing the political strength of mothers*. MAU inspires, educates and engages mothers (a gigantic force to be reckoned with) to prioritize children in our corporate and public policies through monthly Web actions, annual Mother's Day events, field trips to elected officials, Girlcotts, and daily inspiration and tools found in a weekly calendar. MAU brings a new breed of activism to the political landscape; one that is positive, accessible and supports mothers in making informed personal choices, inspiring collective action and influencing decision-makers. MAU, founded in 2002, is based in Boulder, CO. MAU believes that when mothers lead, generations of global citizens will follow.

Let us:
whisper this to each other, sing it out in the streets,
yell it from our rooftops, declare it in our houses of government:
we will protect our children with our personal and political strength,
wherever they live on earth!

* mothers and others, on stilts or off, who exercise protective care over someone smaller.

IN spirited partnership,

Paige La Grone Babcock, for the MAU Mavens both here and away….

paige@mothersactingup.org

Whew!

The first day of school away from homel!
It went VERY well for the boy!!

When I arrived to pick him up, he was holding his spotted kitty and his copy of The Little Engine That Could. He looked up and smiled, then hugged me soooooooo tight. He said he had a "good time."

Miss Johni said he never cried, but the bottom lip trembled right around naptime-- she rocked him until he was very relaxed. And then again with the trembling bottom lip when he woke. (He slept! on the nap mat!) -- that's when she got him his special book to look at at.

Ziggy actually napped for an hour! The teachers had him do everything last so he could have it all modeled by the other kids first. He caught on fast, they say. The "papers they give to mommy" say:

"I had fun.... wearing the mr. Potato Head glasses, putting a basket on my head to make the teachers smile, and I like the sand blocks best in musik."

For lunch I ate: "a lot"

Disposition: "Happy, busy, curious"

Comments: "Great first day! Did not want to make a craft today, but that will come."

I'll leave off the timing of the diaper change, but I will share that Miss Johni said he had a lot of gas after waking from his nap!


I am SO RELIEVED that he was not at all in distress and that he remained so content all afternoon beyond school. We're so proud of our little fellow!

At bedtime, we talked more about the school day and raised hands for lots of questions, like,
Who had a nap on a nap mat today?
Who took his lunch in his lunch box today?
Who has a teacher named Miss Linda?
Who got to play on the playground with Lily and Jet and Sully?
Who sang a song about a merry go round?
Who had a fun time at his new school today?

I fell into slumber with the boy very early in the evening, waking hours later to go crump up with my Mister in the boy's bed where he was reading where we marveled over our boy's independence and his first big step away from us and how crazy huge we love him.....



And this morning we're shaking a tail feather to ready for a a little friend to arrive. I'll be minding her a day or so a week while her folks are at school and work. Ziggy is beside himself with anticipation.

And the day arrived....

Little time to post, as I'm really trying to engage these hours in WORK WORK WORK, but wanted to check in to say that my boy is at his first day of the Mother's Day Out program! His name came up on the wait list and so he began this morning!

We talked about how the day would happen, got his gear all ready, his things labeled (with masking tape for now, Mabel's Labels are on order; Ziggy even wanted to make some of his own labels on the tape, pronouncing "Ziggy Backpack!") I packed him a lovely little lunch: whole wheat pasta w/ homemade yummy veggie salsa, cantaloupe, raisins, pretzels. And a string cheese. Water in his Kleen Kanteen. He's got his backpack w/ a blanket for naptime, change of clothing in a ziplock, a beloved book (The Little Engine that Could), and his dear little spotted kitty. Also, his "fwavorite" hotwheel-- a sexy little gold number-- tucked into the pocket of his cargo shorts. He's wearing a pair of tie dye Maggie's organics socks that my friend Leslie gave him for his birthday-- he LOVES them.

We got there early. Played on the playground. Saw old and new friends. Settled into classroom-- there's a sweet hook with his name for his backpack, a shelf for his lunch. a cubby for his napmat and a file system for his paper diapers.

Ziggy went right up the steps this morning and announced, "This is Ziggy's school!" In the the classroom, with the rest of the Chickadees, he showed Miss Joni and Miss Linda that his car was in his pocket, checked out a couple toys and settled right in at the table with the other children for their snack before Kindermusik. I kissed him and said I loved him. He took it all in as easy as you please, and I departed. A few tears were shed (by me, as I drove toward home.) I passed My Beloved Mister block from our house as he was going to work. We did a quick trade of words and a shared sigh at this big morning, following a big fun family weekend of a combo house warming / fall harvest and big boy birthday party! My family all came in from East Tennessee, the Mister and I took the entire weekend off and our home was full of good friends, delicious food, and fellowship. We've now got both a swingset AND a sandbox in the back yard, thanks to the generosity of friends passing theirs along, and the whole new to us setup got broken in good with our Fall Fiesta, including pinata!

I do hope it's a fun and exciting day for the boy. And that mama will be productive!!

I'll pick him up this afternoon, and when I can, I'll share some readying photos and other news.